Welcome to the other side of pain, power.
I’ve been feeling expansive all this week from my reflections. I’ve return from a couple weeks of travelling across Southeast Asia, primarily Vietnam and Thailand embracing everything I’ve learnt over the past few years. It was a moment of celebration for me because I now understood what it meant to be fully present. Intentions have made a huge difference in my life, speaking out what I want to work on and sending a vibration to the universe to show me the way has provided great wisdom. My resolution for 2021 to “Be Unstoppable” has resulted in the highest level of joy and happiness.
What I’ve learnt is that love is infinite, so any expression of love doesn’t need to be withheld. Giving someone love doesn’t mean you won’t have any love left for anyone else. For the longest time, I felt I had to compartmentalise my feelings according to each situation that comes up, work, friendship, romantic relationships and family. But recently, I view love so differently. I found myself to be in the perfect situation to embody love which meant I could be mindfully love regardless of the outcome. When love is infinite, it is not wasted. In the past, when was not reciprocated, I would go into my shell and start building resentment for “loving” someone, that pain taught me how to hold back love. But now, I am accepting that everyone that has come to my life has played the perfect part, I can honour them for that.
I Love to Love
So often, we hold the word “love” hostage and reserve it for the special moments or the people that are “worthy” of your love–where worth is determined by the length of time or depth of your relationship. Embodying love and feeling myself expand has really changed how I interact with others and how I enter situations from love vs fear. I’m not saying I’m going to walk down the street and tell strangers I love them or even hug my enemies, but it means that I’m not afraid of showing this part of who I am in fear that it will not be reciprocated. I don’t love to be loved back, I love to love. Practicing non-attachment allows me to be fully present to give gratitude for each moment that passes by because I’m not focused on the result, only the now. Living life like in this process is completely new to me, but it’s a new habit that I intend to strengthen.
I eliminate expectations, I surrender control and I let the Universe guide.
Giving myself the opportunity to go with the flow and see what happens allows for more beauty and surprises to unfold. I eliminate expectations, I surrender control and I let God/the Universe guide. The unknown makes space for me to evolve past my preconceived notions of what is supposed to happen and simply enjoy the ride. This clarity provides me with an opportunity to meet challenges with the right frame of mind. If it is not in alignment with who I am or what I want, I can walk away, this is the power that exists within me. I have enough self-trust to believe in my decisions and enough self-compassion to understand my mistakes.
My Cup Runneth Over
My inner work to build my self-love has given me the chance to feel whole again. What I mean is that I don’t require love from others in order to feel whole. I am not a half looking for my other half. In the past I would search for someone to “love on” to give them a love that I craved, and then seek external validation to give myself the false perception of my worthiness. But now, giving that same love to myself is naturally spilling to everyone else. That saying – don’t pour from an empty cup is now followed up with my cup runneth over. This is what growth looks like.
Ridding myself of attachment has helped me feel more free, it has shifted my pain into power. Everything that I look for is from within and it has eliminated my fear of pain because I know my darkest night has turned into the brightest day. It is these moments that will help you find your greatest strength. It’s almost 2 years of doing significant inner work and I’m finally smelling the roses. I am truly grateful for the lessons and the memories that have brought me to the highest form of love, an infinite love that radiates from within.