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Thoughts TravelsFebruary 24, 2009

A Renewed Spirit

By admin

couch
(A picture taken recently at Nurita Harith’s store, by FUNKEE)
I think I’ve blogged enough about detoxing and I think it has now penetrated into my psyche. I don’t know how long this will last but I hope is change for the better.
Physically: people have been telling me about my weight loss and my glowing complection (in comparison to my dull/dry skintone), I’ve been watching my diet with trying to eat salads majority of the time. I’m a real person, I have a huge ass booty that will get bigger if I don’t watch myself. I can gain weight eating McDs everyday, so I need to watch my diet. I’m relatively skinny, but I’m really a fat girl in a skinny body that is waiting to get fat.
Mentally: I’ve stopped becoming a slave to commitments because I feel “bad” or I’m just trying to be “nice”. In the timeframe I’ve been here, I’ve partied my ass off and had enough late nights that I’m glad its slowly coming out of my system starting this year. My perspective on feeling the need to be at every hip party has been replaced with feeling the need to maintain the friendships I’ve built in a less superficial way (good wholesome conversation and fun activities).
Emotionally: I get incredibly attached easily, especially when I find myself drowning in my own self-pity or developing a passion for someone just because I have nothing to do. For the first time, I’ve completely led a day-to-day feeling with my regular interactions and do not feel compelled to pursue it much further than that. I leave things at status quo and keep them there for the sake of preventing myself to walk into an unnecessary heart-ache.
Spiritually: Whether you are Buddhist, Muslim, Jewish or Christian I think there is a spirit inside of us that lives to remind us about our very human mistakes. I managed to pop by a service on Sunday with my cousins to learn about The Cross and its Centrality to the Christian faith. I was reminded as to why I became a Christian in the first place. This industry has many dark corners and it sometimes feels so conflicting to be spiritual and be in entertainment. However, after the sermon, I felt a little bit better about who I have become and not being apologetic for my own shortcomings.
Hopefully these changes will be consistent a few weeks from now and perhaps even longer. I’ve started taking away my distractions and variables. I’m focused and I’m determined. I want to take my life to the next level and Dare to Dream my big dreams! 🙂
The rest on my docket for this week:

  • Filming in Langkawi: travelblog, touristy stuff
  • Filming The Earth Hour promo
  • Covering Nike Event
  • Shooting a Beauty Editorial!!
family, friendships, nurita harith, weight loss
Previous Event – FHM Girls Next Door Party 2009
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