It’s 2023 and I’m a little late in celebrating the new year. To be fair, I usually mark the new year according to the Lunar calendar, not so much the Gregorian calendar.
When I take stock of 2022, I think about all of the different ways I explored love for myself: passion, service and yes, pain. A lot of blood sweat and tears made last year seem like it would never end. I was such a zombie.
Measuring my success has transformed over the years because it has become an evolution of how I see myself. What did it look like? Hmmm, there were a few ups and the rest was just work. Non-stop work. Every time I thought I was taking a break, I was still working. I needed to take a break desperately and I was only able to do so when I left the country.
I finished my certification as a Holistic Coach and managed to put my knowledge into action, after 6 months of 1-3am calls I did it! I was slowly pivoting some of my work to grow into a different direction. I also produced my first men/women’s retreat in November and unearthed a lot of blocks in the process. It was a tough experience personally but I’m really grateful to have persevered. My personal life was also uneventful but for the most part, I declined a lot of situationships because I knew it was better to wait for the right person to come along.
So fast forward to 2023…
Every year I have a motto, most of my friends that have known me since I moved to Asia, usually ask what my motto is for the upcoming year. Well my friends, the word is EQUANIMITY… yes it also shares the name of the 1MDB -scandal-ridden-superyacht. This word has been vibrating throughout the past few months with the ups and downs I had been feeling about my life and its current status.
I used to get easily riled up, easily agitated and always waiting for the opportunity to offer my unsolicited advice and opinions that no one would ask for. So this year I intend on listening a little more and being less reactive to the world around me.
EQUANIMITY: The unattached awareness of one’s experience as a result of the impermanence of momentary reality. It is a peace of mind and abiding calmness that cannot be shaken by any grade of fortunate or unfortunate circumstances.
This is by far my favourite definition of the word. From Buddhism -“The Buddha described a mind filled with equanimity as “abundant, exalted, immeasurable, without hostility and without ill-will.” I want to continue my pursuit for peace and calmness in the way I relate to the world. Whether it is good or bad, there is a lesson that I can learn from. Whether there is pain or joy, this too shall pass.
I want this year to be about being present in my moments with people and my environment. In the past, I was always seeking for the next best thing, chasing my goals, not being able to sit still and always trying to up my game. I neglected a lot of aspects in my journey and when I look back, I can barely remember the moments that had shaped who I am.
I want to live fully and love fully. I want to honour all the feelings and emotions that stir inside, especially in my moments of doubt or the fear that keeps wanting to make decisions for me. I have been so afraid to truly be myself and I worry that I am not good enough, but the tail end of 2022 really shifted for me. I stayed open and I was able to receive and allow the right people to come into my life for me to learn to find my confidence again. I never want to lose sight of who I am.
I want to keep expanding my abundance mindset and welcome a continuous flow of blessings. I will continue to vibrate from a higher place and simply allow. I really want to focus on building my wealth and saving money while investing in the right places. This is the year where we make some money moves!
I want to release my need to be in control and completely surrender without hostility or ill-will. I’ll trust my intuition more and listen to my body when it comes to feeling like an energetic match when it comes to people, projects and places. I can release things that no longer serve me, rather than hold on to things to soothe my ego or to create a false sense of who I am. Essentially, the more myself I become, the happier I get.
18-year old Sarah would be so proud to be where I am today!
My Wawa Crew from church since our Youth Camp days!
I welcome this year with open arms, I was able to fill my cup with so much love when I was back in Canada. I was so grateful that I could spend time with family and friends and celebrate our friendship over decades. It really made me appreciate the relationships I’ve built in the different chapters in my life and still be able to feel like nothing had missed a beat. I no longer fixated on trying to be seen or to look my best to be impressive, instead it was good quality time to the people I love the most. My friend made fun of me because I was willing to meet at a nearby gas station because it was middle ground for both of us! Haha
What’s your intention for 2023?